


Illicit Affairs

by Wolfstarmakesmewet



Category: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Forbidden Love, Friends With Benefits, Multi, Sort Of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:40:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25593682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolfstarmakesmewet/pseuds/Wolfstarmakesmewet
Summary: Alex Claremont-Diaz is in his senior year of University and he's determined to keep his grades up and finally graduate. A wrench is almost immediately thrown in this plan when he meets Henry, a beautiful British man who he REALLY should not be seeing. Will they be able to keep their friends-with-benefits arrangement secret? Or will they allow each other to completely change their lives?
Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, June Claremont-Diaz/Nora Holleran, June Claremont-Diaz/Nora Holleran/Percy "Pez" Okonjo
Comments: 24
Kudos: 120





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Please be gentle with me... This is already the longest thing I've ever written outside of school. This fic is very loosely based on a real situation in my life, so hopefully the updates won't be too far apart. Enjoy!

Alex Claremont-Diaz had a motto. He hadn’t exactly made it up- just modified it from the original. But he lived by the motto:

Work hard. Get results. Play harder. 

It was through this logic that he, Nora, and June found themselves in an Uber downtown to a row of gay bars that were actually pretty strict on IDing, so they could have a good time without dealing with drunk Freshmen with fake IDs on the first Friday after Syllabus Week. Otherwise known to Alex as The First Week of the End. He was officially in his senior year. 

“So because they found out he was sleeping with a student, they fired him. Even though she was an older student and not even in any of his classes.” Alex was in the middle of explaining the biggest gossip from his University that he’d learned that week. Although Nora and June both lived in the DC area, neither of them attended school with Alex. Nora had graduated early from MIT and moved to DC to work for a tech company. June was a gossip columnist for a prominent magazine headquartered in the DC area. So while they saw each other often enough, it was up to Alex to let them know the Hottest Goss. 

“I know you’d never do this Alex,” Nora started. “But I’ve always thought of sleeping with a professor as the ultimate College Bingo slot. You know?” He did not know. But he and June nodded along anyway as the Uber pulled up to the bar and they hopped out.

\----

Several hours- and several shots of tequila- later, Alex and the girls were well and truly hammered. He was so drunk that he almost didn’t notice the beautiful man staring at him from the other end of the bar. Almost. 

Tequila had done its thing and made Alex just the right amount of bold that he sauntered over to Beautiful Man- as he was now being referred to in his head- although it was probably less of a saunter and more of a wobble over. The first thing Alex noticed about Beautiful Man up close was his hand resting on the bar for support. At least they were on an even playing field when it came to drinking. 

The second thing Alex noticed was that he was even more beautiful up close. It was almost hard to look at him. Although that might also be the tequila talking. 

“What’s cooking good looking?” Why those were the first words out of Alex’s mouth, he didn’t know. He guessed he’d blame that on the tequila too. It’d been a while since he’d flirted but surely he couldn’t have forgotten how to do it. It hadn’t been that long. 

To Alex’s relief, Beautiful Man laughed. It was a gorgeous sound. 

“I’m doing much better now that I get to see you up close. And how are you, darling?” 

Oh my god. OH my god. Alex could barely breathe. He was British. Suddenly Alex didn’t think he could attribute the swooping feeling in his stomach to the drinking. There was no doubt in his mind that this man and his words and his accent could kill him right there on the spot and he’d be fine with it. 

Now, here’s the thing about being 22 and drunk in a bar with a ridiculously attractive man in front of you, after having not had sex since your last relationship ended almost a full year ago. You want to move things along fast. Really get into it. And really, who could blame Alex for that? So what he said next wasn’t even really a line, it was just the first thing that came to his head. 

“I’d be better if I was touching you.” Miraculously. Miraculously. It worked. Beautiful Man, although laughing, was now moving his hands around Alex’s hips. It was glorious. But just as fast as the hands had made it to their spot, they were taken away. 

Without even having a second to process what was happening, Alex was hearing June’s voice right in his ear. 

“We’ve gotta get out of here. Nora threw up and they’re kicking her out.” Alex’s brain was still hazy, and he wasn’t fully processing what June was saying, but he knew that tone of voice and knew that he needed to allow her to lead him out. With one last glance at Beautiful Man, Alex was out the door. 

\-----

The weekend went by so quickly that it was suddenly Monday again and Alex was back to No Nonsense Mode. He was typing away on his laptop on a bench outside the library, music blasting. Because of this, he barely noticed when June sat next to him, but at the end of the paragraph he’d been working on he finally looked up at her and pulled out his headphones. 

It wasn’t that Alex didn’t have friends at school. He could certainly hold his own at a party. Although it’d been a while since he’d been to one. But he definitely had a groupchat with a bunch of other people. Though, it was usually used more for organizing study group sessions. Anyway, Alex was too busy trying to stay on the Dean’s List and graduate, he didn’t have time to put himself out there too often. Nora and June were the only people who forced him out of his own head during the week. Often, when June had a little bit of free time, she came to his campus to force him to go eat lunch with her. Alex glanced at his watch. He’d thought it was still before 10am, but now that he really checked it was closer to 1. Oops. 

“Get up,” June was already grabbing the laptop out of his hands and saving his document. “I have things I need to complain about.” 

“What’s up with you?” He was out of breath as they arrived at the cafe around the corner, June had practically jogged there.  
“I don’t want to sound ungrateful,” she began, as they sat at a table in the corner. They came here so often that the people behind the counter just automatically knew what their orders were. He waved at them and they waved back to acknowledge that they were working on it. June continued her train of thought. “But I just wish I was doing work that was a little more meaningful.” This was accompanied by a deep sigh. 

“What do you mean, Junebug?” Alex thought using her nickname might calm June down a little but it was almost like she couldn’t hear him. 

“I think…” She paused to collect her thoughts. “I think I may be regretting accepting the first job offer I received out of college. I was just so excited to be working, to not have to move back to Texas, to be able to live near you. You know?” 

Alex did know, it was such a relief for him when he’d gotten into school far away from their home state, and then when June was also able to be near him. It wasn’t that they’d had a bad life growing up, but there was so much about being a closeted bisexual, living through his parents’ divorce, and just generally being closer to the poverty line than was comforting that made getting into a good college far away feel like one of Alex’s greatest victories. He was sure June had similar feelings. 

“Do you not want to be a writer anymore?” He fully believed that June could do anything she set her mind to, but it might be hard considering that her degree was in journalism. 

“No, no,” June now had a fire in her eyes. “I want to write still, of course. I love writing. But I want to write about actual issues... It’s not that the latest Kardashian drama isn’t entertaining to write about, but it’s also definitely not the hard hitting investigative journalism I thought I’d be doing.”

“Yeah I understand that.” Alex did. He saw how fired up June got when she talked about politics. “So what are you going to do about it?” It was at this point that the server, Maria, dropped off their sandwiches. Alex didn’t miss the wink she sent his way. Maybe he should pay more attention to the staff in this place, Maria was cute. June’s throat clearing brought him back to their conversation. Right, serious conversation. 

“I don’t know. I’m gonna figure it out,” she looked determined now. “But until I do, I need to distract myself. Give me your tinder.” To say that the account was Alex’s was really a technicality. He literally never used it. Nora and June had created it for him after his break up, and from then on been the only people who swiped on people. It had become a source of entertainment for them. Every once in a while they’d show him someone and say, “Oh look Alex, they’re cute, give them a chance.” But if he was honest, he just really didn't have the time or ability to concentrate that it took to go on new dates with people. He handed over his phone and continued to shove his sandwich down his throat. 

After a few minutes of June’s silent swiping, Alex was considering pulling his laptop back out of his bag when she suddenly grabbed his arm. 

“Hey hey hey, why does this guy look so familiar?” June turned his phone to face him and he was suddenly once more face-to-sort-of-face with Beautiful Man. 

“Oh my god, June, you’re magic. I thought I’d never see this guy again.” Alex was now grabbing the phone straight out of her hands. There wasn’t a lot of information on his profile, just: 

Henry, 24  
Less than a mile away

Alex was at a loss for words. So little information, but so much at the same time. Beautiful Man’s name is Henry. And he’s close. 

“Who is he?” June poked a hole in his bubble of realizations. “How do we know him?” 

“We don’t.” Alex was still staring at his phone. He couldn’t look away from Beautiful Henry’s face. “I met him the other night at the bar.” 

“Oh,” He could hear June’s interest peaking, but he was still surprised when she grabbed his phone from him again and made an excited squeak. “He’s so close! I’m swiping right for you.” 

Alex had never moved faster in his life. There was no way he could let June message this man for him. But he wasn’t quick enough. When he looked at his phone, his breath was completely knocked out of his lungs. There, on the screen, was a picture of Henry’s face with the words It’s a match!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am unemployed so these chapters are gonna be dished out p quickly as long as I can stay motivated. Also I am using rules about GAs that my school followed but I don't think every school does so if you're confused let me know and I'll throw in an explanation

Neither of them messaged each other. It’d been several hours since the incident with June, and Alex was growing increasingly anxious.

What if he was one of those guys that just swiped on everyone? What if he just wasn’t interested anymore? Of course, there was also the possibility that he’d just been too busy to look at his phone. Alex could definitely understand that. 

In the hour since he’d arrived back at his dorm room, Alex had been repeating the same routine: pace, sit down and watch several minutes of The Crown on Netflix (he’d recently developed a love for the British accent- who knew why?), pace again, check his phone, see the lack of notifications, pace again. 

When the episode he’d been watching ended and he had no idea what had just happened, Alex once more picked up his phone and this time, tapped on Tinder again. Maybe Henry was waiting on him to make the first move? He had initiated the conversation at the bar so he guessed it made sense that he’d message first too. 

Oh god, was he the jerk for not messaging first?? Alex shook the thoughts from his head. It was just some random guy on Tinder, which was a stupid app anyway. Who cares what he thinks or how beautiful he is? Alex was going to stop feeling anxious about this. 

‘Hey ;)’ 

Okay, well. He was still bad at flirting but at least now he knew he’d taken a chance. Finally, his head was clear enough to continue working on the essay he’d abandoned before. Time to dive back in. 

\------

Somewhere in the midst of his essay writing, Alex had fallen asleep in the chair next to his bed. He woke up with 20 minutes to spare before his first class of the day, a dead laptop, and several notifications on his phone. He lazily opened tinder first, almost forgetting the entire Henry debacle that had consumed his mind yesterday. But once the memory of his ‘Hey ;)’ resurfaced in his mind he started to actually blush. Goddammit. Henry’s reply didn’t help: 

“Hey! I think we owe each other some uninterrupted time soon ;)” 

Holy shit. It was too early in the morning to be reading that. Before he could think about replying, he got a notification that his professor had emailed him an hour ago asking him to meet her in her classroom 10 minutes before class so she could introduce him to someone. 

He got up, dressed, and out the door with lightning speed, praying that the random clothes he’d grabbed were clean. Glancing at his watch he saw he had 5 minutes to spare, a 7 minute walk to the classroom, and that the line for coffee wrapped around the corner. This day was really not it. He started to sprint.

He arrived at the classroom 3 minutes late, only to see that his professor wasn’t even there yet. Why were college professors so frustrating? Alex walked into the classroom and set his bag down on a desk in the back, then finally took a minute to look down at the clothes he’d picked. The jeans weren’t too bad, but the shirt he’d chosen was a little embarrassing. It was one of June’s old track shirts, highlighter pink with the words “Follow Me to Second Place” on the back. Not ideal for potential networking. 

Thankfully, there wasn’t too much time to dwell on that, because he heard his professor’s high heels clicking down the hallway. 

“Alex!” She swept into the room with what appeared to be a literal cape over her shoulders. This was not Alex’s first time taking a class with Professor Althea, and he’d come to love her eccentric nature. She reminded him so much of the characters in those wizard movies his friends used to love growing up. 

“Thank you so much for coming early,” she continued to move into the room to place a stack of papers on the table closest to the whiteboard. “I’m so excited to introduce you to one of the department’s new Graduate assistants. I think it will be so nice for the two of you to get to know each other. He graduated as a political science major, but like you he’s focused on working with nonprofits.” Despite Professor Althea’s tendency to ramble, Alex’s interest was definitely piqued. 

“I would definitely love to meet him, professor,” Alex started, but trailed off when a throat cleared. 

“Hi Alex, it’s so nice to finally meet you. Professor Althea has told me so much about you.” The voice came from the doorway, which was now behind Alex. The British voice. Alex whipped his head around. 

“I’m Henry.” 

And there, in front of him, was Beautiful Man from the bar, Henry, who he’d messaged on Tinder last night, and who’d replied with a message that had filthy connotations. He was holding his hand out for Alex to shake, but it took him a full second to even register that. Alex was far too concerned with the alarm bells ringing in his head. 

After staring at Henry for far too long, he eventually decided to act like a human being and shake his hand. 

“So nice to meet you, Henry,” Alex thought maybe he was talking a bit too loud, but there was nothing he could do about that at the moment. “So you’re a GA? Are you getting your masters?” The memory of Henry’s Tinder profile reading ‘less than a mile away’ flashed through his head. 

“Yeah, I should have it by the end of the year. Professor tells me you’re also graduating in May?” To Henry’s credit, he was acting like a perfectly normal person who hadn’t had his hands on Alex’s hips less than a week ago. But now that Alex was forcing himself to really pay attention to the conversation, he could see the wild look in Henry’s eyes that either meant he remembered or that he’d had far too much caffeine this morning. Either was possible, and the thought that Alex wasn’t the only party in this situation who was freaking out made him feel a little more calm. 

“I wanted you two to meet because you’re such great individual thinkers and I was hoping your brains combined could really take those ideas to the next level.” Professor Althea, thankfully, didn’t seem to notice the tension in her classroom. “Alex, especially as you’re an undergrad student, I expect you to fully take advantage of Henry being here.” Alex had to close his eyes to force his mind not to think about fully taking advantage of Henry. 

The rest of the class started streaming into the room, so Alex took a seat and watched Henry take a seat in the front of the room and pull out a notebook. The back of his head was so pretty. God this was going to be a difficult class. 

\-----

It was a long 83 minutes of staring at the back of Henry’s head, until Professor Althea finally dismissed them. 

Alex was ready to bury his head under his pillow for the rest of the week if he was being honest. Anything to stop the awkward tension that he was sure only he and Henry could feel. Of course, the universe wasn’t going to let Alex win today. 

Henry was in front of him now, blocking his path to the door. 

“What do you say we maybe grab some coffee and discuss your thesis topic? I’d love to hear all about what you’re thinking of writing about.” Henry had put extra emphasis on “discuss” so there was no doubt in Alex’s mind that they would not be having an academic conversation. Amazing. 

“Yes,” he was doing his best impression of businessmen he saw on TV now. “I’d love to DISCUSS.” Very cool, calm, and collected. 

They walked in silence to the cafeteria’s coffee stand. They did not say a word to each other while ordering their coffees, nor did they speak when walking over to a tiny table in the back, which was only near one other woman with music playing so loud through her headphones that they could hear it from a few feet away. 

“So… “ Alex was intently staring at Henry, who had either seen something incredibly interesting floating in his coffee, or he was doing his best to avoid making eye contact. Either way, staring at Henry wasn’t something Alex could complain about. 

“Listen-” The abrupt word from Henry was hushed but urgent. “I can’t lose this job. I’d lose my housing, the tuition they’re paying for my masters classes, my visa… There’s too much on the line.”

“Okay?” Alex was confused. “And why would you lose all of that?” Henry huffed out a breath, but he still didn’t look up at Alex. 

“If we were to….” Here, he trailed off like Alex could fill in the rest and looked up at him with pleading eyes. “And if someone found out that we…” 

“That we what?” 

“If someone thought we were…” Henry looked around to make sure no one around us had developed supersonic hearing, and lowered his voice even further. “...Involved. I could get in big trouble.” 

Suddenly it dawned on Alex. He’d just been telling June and Nora about the professor who got fired. Henry was afraid that’d happen to him. 

“Okay I understand what you’re saying but we’re not involved. And you’re not even a professor.” 

“No, but we exchanged some inappropriate messages, and I’m going to need those to disappear.” He said, like he wasn’t the one who’d sent the inappropriate message in the first place. Alex rolled his eyes but let it slide. “And,” Henry continued. “It’s in my employee contract that there can’t be any fraternizing with students as long as the school is compensating me.” At this, he looked genuinely regretful, like not sleeping with Alex had really ruined his day. That was at the very least a pretty good pick-me-up. 

“Okay so we’ll just act like nothing happened. Which is easy… because it didn’t.” Alex pinched himself repeatedly under the table to keep the neutral expression on his face. 

“Yes, exactly. Nothing happened. And I’m gonna need you to delete that conversation. I’ll do it too.” 

As far as requests went, these weren’t too hard to follow. He’d just avoid Henry and focus on his school work. They deleted the messages while they sat there drinking their coffee, and moved on to talking about their schoolwork. It was a genuinely interesting conversation. Henry was very smart, and clearly passionate about his studies. And he was funny too. And so cute. 

By the time they’d been sitting there for an hour they agreed to be merely the equivalent of work acquaintances. They’d work together when they had to, and say hi when they saw each other, but other than that there was no reason to talk. 

As Alex was getting up from the table to go to the library, he was actually feeling pretty good about himself. He was really patting himself on the back for such a mature conversation. As he was getting up though, Henry grabbed his arm to stop him. 

“One more thing. Just please don’t tell anyone.” Alex smiled and nodded, and did his absolute best to ignore the sparks shooting up his arm from where Henry touched him. 

\----

That night, he was on Facetime with Nora, and she’d just finished explaining a conspiracy theory about pigeons and spy cameras. He didn’t really follow, honestly. But the conversation had reached that point where they were now just mutually silent. 

He sighed. 

“Nora, please get me fucking wasted this weekend.”

She smiled wickedly back at him. “One wasted weekend, coming right up!”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short because writing dialogue makes me sick

Come Friday, Alex was hanging upside down off the side of June’s bed watching her and Nora flirt, a surefire sign they shouldn’t have finished that last bottle of wine. It’s not that they didn’t also flirt when they were sober, but when they were drunk there were even less boundaries than normal. Alex cleared his throat to remind them he was still there, and wasn’t going anywhere. They whipped their heads toward him. 

“That’s much better,” he smiled. “I was starting to think the world didn’t actually revolve around me.” Nora sighed and picked up her phone. 

“I don’t know what else you want from us. I already told you, I think you should flirt lowkey. It’s not like he can get in trouble for what you do.” She was really concentrating on the screen now, and he saw the reflection of the screen in the mirror behind her for half a second when she shifted her sitting position on the floor. Leave it to Nora to have a serious conversation while scrolling through Instagram. “Just keep it lowkey, maybe you guys can still be friends.” Finally, she put the phone down and returned her gaze to him. 

“I think the situation isn’t as complicated as you think.” His retort was lost on his lips when he cut off by June’s sudden snoring. Sprawled on the floor, she couldn’t have been comfortable, Alex started to get up off the bed.

“I guess that’s my cue to leave.” He helped Nora heave her onto the bed and grabbed his jacket, it was starting to get chilly at night. 

“Wait-” Nora pressed his phone in his hand and gave him a kiss on the cheek, quickly followed by a light slap. “Don’t forget that, text me when you get home. And remember… sometimes you have to take risks to get good things out of life.” 

And with that, she shoved a confused, tired, and drunk Alex out the door and slammed it shut. 

Glancing at his phone told him that it wasn’t too late to walk home alone, at 10:30 on a Friday there’d be plenty of other people out and about, so Alex set off on the short walk back to his dorm. It was mostly uneventful until he got a notification as he was entering his building. Considering that June and Nora were definitely already sleeping, Alex was insanely curious about who could be contacting him. 

‘Instagram: @Henry_fox followed you back!’ 

Alex had to pause to fully take that one in. He had no recollection of ever following Henry on instagram so he didn’t know how he was being followed back. And he definitely wasn’t drunk enough to forget doing something like that. 

A flashback of Nora scrolling through instagram popped into his head. He’d thought she was on her phone, but then when he left she’d handed him his phone. Her cryptic parting words made much more sense now. He was going to kill her. Right after he scrolled through Henry’s instagram. 

\----

The next day when he called her, Nora did not apologize to Alex for following Henry, but she did offer him advice for how to move forward. 

“Post a nice picture on your story to see if he watches it.” 

“What nice picture? I don’t think I’ve taken any pictures since mom made us do that photoshoot at Christmas.” There’d been so many props. So many. 

“Okay so take one. A sexy one. But not too sexy.” 

“What does that even mean?”

“She means post a thirst trap!” This interjection came from a distant June. “Maybe take a picture of you being studious but also with your shirt off.” 

Alex honestly couldn’t imagine that ‘trapping’ anyone but he spent the afternoon trying to take a nice picture like that. It took a while (far too long) but eventually he had one he liked, posted it on his story, and then finally went about his day. 

It was hours later that he got the notification he was waiting for. 

‘Instagram: @Henry_fox “Hello there… Hope the studying is going well, let me know if you have any questions”

@ACD “Hey… Thinking about my thesis topic in this pic, can’t wait to discuss on Monday.”

@Henry_fox “Looking forward to it :)” 

Honestly, the conversation wasn’t particularly flirty, but it was still the most exhilarating conversation Alex had had in weeks.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Stefon voice* This chapter has everything. Sexy feelings, sad feelings, confusing feelings and then more sexy feelings.

The next few weeks were simultaneously uneventful and very fucking eventful. Alex and Henry would talk after class, sometimes they’d message each other on instagram, and then if they saw each other around campus (which happened every Wednesday at 2:15 when Alex was leaving the lecture hall and Henry was entering it) they’d nod politely but never stop for a chat. To anyone on the outside looking in, Alex and Henry were merely academic acquaintances. 

But Alex had a secret. 

Sometimes, in their completely innocent instagram DMs, he’d slip an innuendo or two into the conversation. Nothing too bad, just ‘Yeah, gonna go to the library and study long and hard’. And he couldn’t be sure, but it seemed like sometimes Henry would return his hidden innuendos: ‘I hope you think of me while you do it’. 

It had gotten to the point where Alex could get hard just by picking up a textbook, which scared him because he and Henry weren’t even flirting. They were just making subtle references to their dicks.   
By the time the first Monday of October rolled around, Alex was afraid his dick was developing a Pavlovian response to his thesis topic, which would make his end-of-semester presentation a little awkward. 

“Hey Alex,” Henry, arms full of papers and books, materialized in front of him after Professor Althea had dismissed them for the day. “I have some articles I think you’ll find really interesting, but I need to drop some of this stuff off in my office first.”

“You have an office?” They were already walking side by side down the carpeted hallway to the part of the building that clearly did not get the same amount of TLC that the part of the building the classrooms were in. “Why is this my first time hearing about this?”

Henry ignored the question as he shouldered the big, wooden door open. 

“Have a seat. Sorry, it’s a little tight. It’ll just take me a second to find that article.” He’d thrown the pile of stuff that was previously in his hand onto the already large pile of books and papers on his desk. He then proceeded to begin to dig through the pile. “Sorry, I’m usually much more organized than this, I’ve just been so busy lately.” Henry was now frantically digging through the papers and sweating. 

Alex had not yet taken a seat like instructed because Henry’s frantic energy was making him anxious.

“Hey, it’s okay. I don’t need the article right now. Just get it to me when you find it.” He was using his most soothing voice, but it didn’t seem to be working. 

“No, I’ll find it right now. At least if I could find this goddamn paper I could do one thing right toda-” Henry’s thoughts caught up to his mouth, and his whole body froze. Slowly he met Alex’s eyes. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to be so intense. Just having a bad day. Sorry.” 

“Stop apologizing,” Alex walked closer to the desk, which took only a step because the office was so small. “We all have bad days. Do you want to talk about it?” 

For a second it looked like there was nothing Henry wanted more than to talk about it, but then his face completely closed off. 

“No,” he looked down again and started to calmly organize his desk. “Just give me one minute to get myself organized and I’ll get you that article. Please,” He gestured emphatically to the chair Alex was leaning against. “Sit down.” Alex had no choice but to listen, simultaneously liking the authority in Henry’s voice and feeling concern over the sudden shift in mood. 

They were silent for about 5 minutes, Alex didn’t really know. He was taking the time that Henry wasn’t paying attention to him to study him again. Just scanning his eyes over the amalgamation of beautiful features that made up Henry’s face. He was kind of zoned out on the area between his eyebrows when Henry finally looked up and met his eyes again. It honestly kind of startled him. The frantic intensity that had been in his eyes before was now replaced by a deep sadness that unfortunately did not seem new to Henry. 

“Here, I really like the author’s take, I think it would provide a great basis for a counter-argument in your thesis.” Alex left Henry’s hand outstretched for just a moment too long before finally grabbing the article. He wanted to say something to help Henry but his head was completely empty. So he just turned around and started to walk out the door. 

He was one-foot-in, one-foot-out of Henry’s office when he heard a strangled whisper. 

“Alex?” He paused and turned his head to look at Henry. The pain in his eyes had intensified so much that Alex could barely look at them. Henry kept his voice at a low whisper. “Please don’t be offended if I don’t answer your messages anymore. I just.... can’t keep giving myself hope that there’s a way I can be with you.” 

And with that, Henry took a seat behind his desk and opened the first book on the top of the pile, effectively dismissing Alex from his office. 

\-----

Although he knew that it really solidified him as a nerd, his freshman year Alex had signed up to join the debate club. He attended meetings less and less as the years went on, but he was still on the email list and so he had the habit of ignoring the emails they sent him. This turned out to be a particularly unfortunate choice as at their weekly meeting the week before Homecoming, they’d voted that their contribution to the Homecoming celebration was going to be a dunk tank, and for the first three hours of its operation, Alex was getting dunked. 

That’s how, by 12:30 on a chilly Saturday, Alex found himself shirtless, soaking wet and much much less sober than June and Nora, who were sitting to the side of the tank. It turns out having an attraction based on the accuracy of a throw is a big attraction at a football game. 

There were only 30 minutes left until the next unfortunate soul was up to be dunked, but Alex felt like the minutes were taking hours to pass. It had been a few minutes since he’d last been dunked, and he honestly didn’t have too much confidence in the man that was up next. Sometimes Texas stereotypes really stuck with Alex and looking at this man, they were popping out. He was wearing a flashy, sparkling shirt that Alex swore he’d seen on the model on the cover of June’s fashion magazines last month. His features were intense but beautiful, almost regal. Basically, if Alex was going to guess what activity this guy was doing, it would probably be karaoke and not the dunk tank. 

He wound up his arm to throw, and hit the bullseye dead on. 

When Alex popped out of the water, he was still spluttering water from the unexpected dunk. 

“Yeah baby! Sixth form cricket come through!” The decidedly british man was now yelling and dancing. Although his eyes were still blurry, Alex could see someone coming through the crowd toward the man, but he didn’t have to see to know who it was. He knew from the laugh alone. 

“Good job, Pez,” Henry was laughing and high-fiving the man now. Finally Alex’s eyes cleared enough to fully see Henry’s side profile. He was glad to see that the sadness he’d seen the week before was gone. He was not glad, however, to notice that Henry was doing his absolute best to pretend he wasn’t right in front of him. June’s flailing arms distracted him enough to finally look away. 

She was mouthing something and frantically pointing at Henry. If he had to guess, she was probably saying something like ‘Is that the gorgeous man you won’t shut up about?’ But he could be wrong. He tried to subtly tell her to stop, but she was far too drunk to be taking subtle hints.

He wasn’t the only one who noticed June’s frantic jumping apparently, because Henry’s friend was now strolling over to her and Nora. Alex was straining hard to try to hear any part of their conversation, but all he could hear were loud giggles. 

By the time the next person came to relieve him of his post, Alex was practically flying toward the group. 

June and Henry’s friend were now deep in conversation, so close they were practically holding each other up. Nora saw him coming and turned to reach into her bag for the thermos of mixed drink they’d made for Alex to catch up to them. That left Henry standing awkwardly to the side, but his eyes widened when Alex approached. He didn’t see fear or annoyance in them though, instead he saw Henry’s wide eyes moving up and down his body. 

“Alex! You did so good drowning up there!” Nora was pressing his thermos into his hand, cap already unscrewed. 

“Yes, so good! You almost managed not to look like a drowning rat.” June’s attention turned to him. “Have you met Pez?” She was gesturing to Henry’s sparkly friend. 

“Yeah, I guess. If you count him dunking me.” Alex was trying to focus but he really couldn’t keep his eyes off Henry, who definitely couldn’t keep his eyes off him. Interesting. 

The conversation around them continued, but Alex and Henry weren’t really in it. If sexual tension was a physical object, it’d be sitting right there in between them, thick as hell. Somehow, their friends knew to avoid the topic of Alex and Henry already knowing each other, and let them be the creeps staring each other down. That is, until Nora yanked them both into the conversation. 

“Hey, can one of you please show me where a nice bathroom is? There’s no way I’m using the port-a-potties.” The two boys immediately jumped on the chance at the same time, to which she replied, “Great. You can both walk me.” 

The three of them walked to the bathroom by Henry’s office in complete silence. When Nora went in the bathroom, Alex finally decided to break the tension. 

“So how’s Homecoming going for you so far?” Henry took a step toward him. 

“If I’m being honest, I can’t stop staring at you.” Alex’s breath left his body. 

“So don’t stop.” Henry kept walking toward him, until they were toe to toe. 

“I don’t think I will.” Their faces were moving closer. Like they both knew that the magnetic pull between them wouldn’t let up until their lips touched. The door to the bathroom suddenly burst open, forcing Alex and Henry to spring apart. 

“Oh man, I feel sorry for whoever has to go in there next. I just dropped a Fat One.” 

Nora, somehow oblivious, walked ahead of them back out to the lawn with all the games and Alex started to follow. Before he could get too far though, Henry grabbed him and brought his mouth down to his ear. 

“If you want, in a little bit, I’m going to send you an address that you have absolutely no obligation to arrive at later tonight, probably around 10:30, where I’ll also be located. Nod if that’s okay with you.” Alex frantically nodded. 

“Great.” And then Henry’s body was gone from his and he was speed walking ahead to catch up with Nora.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally cannot handle angst so I had to immediately make it up to myself.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost wrote "climax" while writing this chapter but I felt too much like the principle in 10 things I hate about you.

If Nora and June thought it was odd that Alex told them he was going to bed at 9pm, they didn’t say anything. 

After their bathroom adventure, Henry’d said no words to Alex, had barely looked at him other than to slip him a piece of paper with an address. Then he and Pez left them. By 10:30 that night when Alex was approaching the apartment number written on the paper, he hadn’t touched a drink for hours. And he was nervous. 

Frankly, the tone Henry set for this meetup was ominous. And the mixed signals leading up to tonight were not helping put his mind at ease. Despite the thoughts running rampant in his head, Alex brought his fist up to the door to knock. 

Within seconds the door swung open and Henry’s head was sticking out and looking around to make sure Alex was the only one in the hallway. When he was satisfied with his findings, Alex was ushered into the dimly lit apartment. It was a tiny one bedroom, with the couch and kitchen on one end of a narrow hallway and a queen size bed on the other. The only form of light were tiny lamps on small, neat tables and the large TV, currently paused halfway through a movie on Netflix. Alex recognized Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman but he didn’t think he’d seen this one before. 

Henry was wearing grey sweatpants and a loose navy blue v-neck. The combination of this look and the new surroundings had Alex unsure of where to look first, though the grey sweats seemed to be winning the battle. 

Henry walked over to the couch and sprawled his body across the corner facing Alex. In turn, he toed off his shoes at the door and sat properly in the opposite corner. For a second, they just looked at each other in the silence. It was so silent that Alex could hear Henry taking a deep breath in to speak. 

“I hope you don’t mind the movie, it’s just good background noise…” He trailed off, leaving Alex once again wondering what he was really in Henry’s apartment for. They silently watched an entire episode before Alex could no longer contain himself. 

“Henry what am I doing here?” Henry’s head whipped around, eyes like a deer in headlights. Alex didn’t give him too much time to answer, the anxiety had been building up in his body all day and now all the thoughts he’d been having came spilling out. “I mean, if you really invited me over to watch TV with you and sit in silence, that’s fine. I might be bad at it but I’m okay with trying. But personally, I feel like we had a moment this morning that suggested I might be coming here as more than a friend, and I’m definitely okay with that. And I’d also be good at that one at least. But also what’s up with you? What’s going on in your head? Because I know this situation is complicated but it kind of felt to me like you’d made up your mind this morning and now it feels like maybe I misread the situation? I don’t know.” Alex finally took a breath. 

Henry had started slowly nodding during his little monologue, and continued to do so for a minute or two after Alex finished talking. 

“First of all, I’m sorry for the confusion. But to be fair, I’ve also been incredibly confused,” Henry scrubbed a hand down his face. “I did invite you here for reasons that the school board would absolutely not approve of.” Henry’s dirty non-dirty talk had Alex’s stomach fluttering again. “I just… I really cannot afford to have anyone find out about this. But I also can’t deny that I’m insanely attracted to you. So if we do this no one can know, Alex. No one. We can’t date, neither of us would benefit from catching feelings… this would have to be a purely physical arrangement. Does that make sense?” 

“It does. I think I can for sure handle a physical arrangement. Definitely.” Alex was already leaning toward Henry. He couldn’t stop himself now. Henry let out a soft laugh. 

“I’m serious, Alex. No one can know. Not even June and Nora. I won’t even tell Pez. Are you sure you’re okay with that?” Their eyes met, and they were now significantly closer since Alex had crawled up onto all fours to cross the small distance from his side of the couch to Henry’s. 

“Yeah,” Alex whispered, his lips were so close to Henry’s that they faintly brushed together while he spoke. “I’m okay with that.” 

Those were the last coherent sentences they spoke before their lips finally came together. After weeks of build up, the kiss was intense, and their hands were now moving frantically over each other. They managed to keep their lips pressed together even as they undressed and moved into the bedroom, leaving Netflix still running in the living room. 

\----

Alex never stayed the night. It was one of their unspoken rules, among others, including:  
They didn’t cuddle, that was too coupley  
During the day, they strictly only spoke about academics  
Henry never went to Alex’s room for fear of a student seeing him  
And their worst unspoken rule, in Alex’s opinion, was that Henry never talked about whatever it was that was bothering him.

He knew there was something bothering him, and he knew it was specific to their arrangement because the crease between his eyebrows only ever appeared in the silence that immediately followed the noise they’d make together. When they were laying there, catching their breath, the line would appear. Alex figured it was probably because Henry was nervous someone would find out, so he made sure to mention that he was keeping it a complete secret. 

He really was, too. Though it pained him not to tell June and Nora, they were distracted enough that he could just brush off their questions about Henry. And honestly, Alex kind of wanted to keep it just for himself.

Though the sneaking around was stressful, he was the most satisfied he’d ever been. It was like sleeping with Henry was the cure for the everyday stress in his life. Been writing papers for 48 hours straight? Go to Henry’s. Can’t seem to figure out the right way to get your point across in that essay? Go to Henry’s. Simply feeling a little anxious? Go to Henry’s. 

Maybe Alex was giving him too much credit, but he was pretty sure Henry had a magical penis. 

That thought alone made Alex snicker out loud, causing Nora to look up from her laptop at him. 

“What’s wrong with you?” She stared at him accusingly. “You’ve been silent for 20 minutes. I think that might actually be a record for you.” 

“There’s nothing wrong with me.” Alex tried to make his face as neutral as possible. Nora always knew when he was lying though. 

“Yes there is. There is clearly something going on with you.” She paused for a moment. “But because I’m such a nice person I’m not going to pry. But if it’s drugs, tell me which ones because I’m pretty sure only some strong stuff could make you this calm.” She looked back at her laptop and kept typing. 

“Why are you being so nonchalant?” Now Alex was incredibly suspicious. The only time Nora didn’t pry into his secrets was when she was hiding something. “What are you hiding from me?” 

“What are you hiding from me?” She countered back. 

“Nothing.” 

“Great, I’m not hiding anything either.” She didn’t even look up at him, another sure sign she was lying. He started to feel stressed about it but then he remembered his new trick. 

@ACD: Hey, tonight at 10? 

@Henry_fox: Yes please

He’d forget all about his worry by midnight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's short but I felt like there was enough going on that I couldn't write too much. Also, tysm for the nice comments, you have no idea how happy they make me :)


	6. Chapter 6

“Mmm yes right there.”

“Oh, I like that. Do that again”

Henry did indeed do it again, causing Alex to release a string of mumbled expletives. They were naked in Henry’s bed, having already danced the naked tango once already tonight. As they started up the second time they were moving more slowly, taking their time with each other. Alex loved every version of their alone time, but he especially loved this. He felt so close to Henry, and sometimes in his dreams he’d flash back to these scenarios but his brain would morph it into more than just lazy fucking. In his dreams they were moving slow like this because they were Making Love. He didn’t think too much about that, though. Everyone has dreams like that, he’s sure, so it doesn’t really mean anything. 

In real life, Henry’s hands were doing something that had Alex’s eyes rolled to the back of his head, and his soft groan sounded jarring compared to the silence of their panting breaths. Not nearly as jarring, however, as the banging now coming from Henry’s door. 

“Henry, darling, is your door locked? Why the hell is your door locked? Let me in!” Alex vaguely recognized the voice as Henry’s friend Pez, and from the panic on Henry’s face, he was guessing he’d also actually stuck to their ‘no telling’ rule. Pez continued knocking and talking. “I am going to break in if you don’t open this door in a few seconds, Henry.” The lock on the door started jiggling. Henry’s eyes were huge, but he silently jumped off the bed, grabbed Alex’s clothes, threw them in the closet and then silently pleaded with him to also get in. 

He did, and it had everything to do with Alex’s easy going nature and nothing to do with the fact that the prospect of being surrounded by Henry’s clothes (and incidentally, also his scent) was just a little bit arousing. 

From his spot in the closet, he barely managed to get his pants back on before Pez was bursting through the door. Alex couldn’t see anything, but he could hear pretty well, so he tried to make as little noise as possible.

“Babes, what the hell is going on? Why didn’t you answer me?”

“Uhhh sorry,” Henry clearly hadn’t had the time to think up an excuse. “I was ummmm… I uh had uhhhh a bad stomach. So I was in the bathroom. And I just came out at the same time that you let yourself in.” Alex rolled his eyes. But Pez seemed to buy it. 

“Oh my god, yeah, you do look flushed. Can I get you something? Go sit down.” He heard them move toward the couch, where it was harder for Alex to hear, so he kind of started to zone out. It just smelled so good where he was sitting. 

After a few minutes though, he heard Pez’s voice come closer again. 

“This girl is killing me, Henry. I’m telling you. I’m sorry it didn’t work out with you and her brother, but June is incredible.” Alex heard the proverbial record scratch. He was just hazarding a guess but he didn’t think there were too many Junes in the DC area. Pez kept talking. “Let me grab you a sweater and then I’ll tell you all about our little get together last night.” Alex was so hung up on the last part of the sentence that he didn’t register the first part until it was too late. Pez, despite Henry’s protests from a few feet behind him, had already ripped open the closet door, only to see a half naked Alex staring back at him. 

The three of them were silent for several heavy seconds. Pez’s head was now swinging back and forth between Alex and Henry. 

On his last swing toward Henry he said, “Were you lying to me about being sick?!” 

\-----

In the living room now, the general confusion continued on. 

“Are you dating my sister?” Pez looked a little guilty at this question. 

“We’re not ummm… dating per say. We’ve just hooked up a few times...” He got a faraway look in his eyes, then seemed to remember he was talking to Alex and cut himself off. “But I promise I really like her and I’m trying to date her.” Alex decided to ignore the implication that June was only interested in casual sex. 

“I can’t believe she wouldn’t tell me.” He knew this must be the secret Nora had been keeping from him, which meant that June had specifically asked her not to tell. And that kind of hurt. 

“To be fair man, I did just catch you literally in the closet, which I’d normally congratulate you on except for the fact that I’d already seen your flirty texts with my friend.”

Both Alex and Henry- who’d been up until now sitting with his head in his hands- whipped their heads up to look at Pez. 

“Pez,” Henry was clearly confused, and every word that was coming out of his mouth seemed to have question marks at the end of them. “What do you mean you saw our flirty messages?” The silence stretched on for a full, long minute. 

“Well,” Pez put -what Alex assumed was- his most charming smile on. “I just happen to have the login information for your instagram account… and one night I was accidentally logged in as you when Alex followed you on there, and I just did you the favor of following him back, and then you were so happy he followed you and I thought it was cute so I sometimes just checked in to see how things were going…” 

If there was an image under ‘bashful’ in the dictionary, it would be a picture of Pez at this moment. Alex finally sat down, he was exhausted right now. Henry’s face was growing more and more red. When he spoke, his mouth barely opened, and it seemed like a major effort to even get the words out.

“You… kept… checking… in… ?” Henry’s right eye was twitching, and his hands were fists at his side. Alex was ashamed to admit he was finding angry Henry a little bit of a turn on, but he’d keep that to himself for now. 

“Yes,” Pez was rushing to get his words out now. “I’m sorry, I know it was an invasion of your privacy. But you weren’t telling me and it’s just been so long, and with all that stuff your grandma was saying to you-” Henry made an arm movement that he guessed Pez knew to mean ‘stop talking about my family drama in front of this guy I’m casually hooking up with’. Then they descended into silence once more. This time though, they all seemed to be contemplating the several revelations that had come out in the last 20 minutes. 

Pez took a sharp inhale, snapping them out of it once more. 

“Yeah, I’m gonna go.” And like a tornado, he quickly grabbed his things and flew out the door. 

Henry and Alex stared at the exit for a minute before looking at each other. Alex didn’t really know what to say to him, because most of their conversations were purely academic, and he didn’t really think right now was the time. 

Henry seemed to also not really know what to say, and he just climbed on the couch next to Alex in silence and put his head on his lap. The sadness on his face was something incomprehensible to Alex, and a few times, Alex thought he might say something, but each time he stopped himself. They fell asleep like that, Alex sitting up straight, stroking Henry's hair in his lap.

**Author's Note:**

> Leave a comment, or don't. But if you're gonna be mean please be nice enough to make it creative :) See you in the next chapter!


End file.
